WHY THIS BLOG?

I AM PARCA'S CHOSEN:
My name is Denise Sevier-Fries (nee Buchy). Parca is the Roman Goddess of Childbirth and Destiny and after you get to know me, you will see why I believe she has, without doubt, made me her Poster Child. Come here for some serious issues, but mainly just some cheeky fun; satire with the odd parody tossed in, and a generous helping of hyperbole, with a dollop of facetiousness.

I am Canadian so expect a bit of politeness too. Sorry.

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1) MY eBOOKS CAN BE FOUND ON AMAZON: here

2) MY eBook Trailers are on YOUTUBE
3) My website:denisesevierfries.com
4) My Photo-Art Youtube Trailer is here too.





Thursday, October 6, 2016

10 CLEVER OUTLANDER S3 'SEIZING THE MOMENT' MOMENTS! *SPOILERS*

Whether you agree with how the Outlander novels have been adapted to the show, you have to give Starz and director Ron Moore credit for adapting to The Moment. Translating a scene from page to screen is difficult at best, but being creative and spontaneous has helped Moore and company make their vision/version an 'on-budget' reality that entertains. No small feat.

Here are 10 'Seizing The Moment' moments that are clever and worthy of tipping of our hats: as always, click pic to enlarge

1) Sam's Obsession With Pokémon Go.

Original footage

CGI removed SmartPhone for final cut


It is well known on set that actor Sam Heughan has an almost debilitating need to play Pokémon Go. So, when it came time to shoot the fight scene with Tobias Menzies (Black Jack Randall), Moore secretly directed Tobias grabbed Sam's SmartPhone and slide it in his belt, taunting Sam with never intending to give it back. The results of this masterstroke of genius will be seen on the screen by all, very soon

2) The Outlander Crew Parties are Legend. And on Film...sorta.
If you look closely at this shot of Claire walking through the battlefield, you will see she has actually been added in with CGI technology. The infamous cast and crew PTYP parties(Party Till You Puke) made a cost efficient battlefield scene for Moore as he simply waited until nightfall after a long days shooting, and filmed the crew passed out all over the field behind the trailers where they live while working. As they habitually dress up in Outlander costumes while drinking (everyone wants to wear a kilt), Moore didn't have to worry about the 'bodies' looking out of their era.

Anyone found asleep in their chairs were gently placed in a supine or prone position on the ground and all bottles were carefully replaced with a soft, fake sword. (*early use of real swords proved rather dangerous and resulted in too many cut lips)

3) Outlander Book Fans Never Clean Their Houses.


In scene like the one above with Bree and Roger wading through a messy pile of junk and old Must Keeps, Starz saves on location fees and set design by running contests for fans with the messiest homes, wherein the winner gets to have their room made into a set for the day/week for filming. Book fans (and many show fans who re-watch episodes every day on a loop for hours on end) are famous for not having time to both do housecleaning AND being an Outlander fan, so they can now try and be a part of Outlander history.

If you want to enter the 'HOUSEKEEPING SUCKS SASSENACH!' contests, call toll free, Monday through Friday, 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. here: 1-800-JAMIE-AWAITS


4) Ron Moore Based Much of Season 3 on 'Scottish Ninjas'.


It's his favorite cartoon. Nuff said.


5) Tobias Hates Fruit. (except one: see why here: peaches #8)

Pre CGI manipulation

Post CGI manipulation

When an unsuspecting extra brought Tobias a fruit bowl at break, Moore caught Tobias' furious reaction and used CGI technology to remove the fruit for the gloriously explosive  scene.

No extras and only one apple was hurt during this scene.


6) Professional Make-up Artists are Very Expensive, So They are Not Hired.


Wherever battle/crowd filming is taking place, ads are placed in local papers asking for artists and fans with painting/make-up skills to apply for the chance to 'Paint Sam' (or Paint Graham, or Paint Tobias, etc...as is needed). Typically, there are between 80 to 3380 applicants, depending on the size of the village/town/city on or near the shooting location. Only three are hired per location and they only have to pay Starz $20.00 per hour each for the privilege (note: painting Sam costs the lucky artist $20.00 per hour but is less as one goes down the cast list, $2.50 being the lowest for painting anonymous clansmen. *FACT: nobody is allowed to paint Tobias as Black Jack, after one woman tried to stab him in the eye with a eyebrow pencil. He does his own make up now.


7) Hate Can Be Profitable. And Pretty.

To ease the escalating cost of production, there is a new line of 'OUTLANDER FUCK THEM JEWELRY out for passionate fans:


There is an extra large batch of Fuck Leghair necklaces being made to accommodate the expected influx of orders from the awesome Outlander Series group I am admin of on FaceBook (come join us...click here). We do hate us some Leghair...


8) Pictures are Worth a Thousand Words, and Perhaps Millions of Dollars.


I am NOT saying this was leaked from a safe at Starz headquarters.
I am NOT saying Raymond Einstein is real.
I am NOT saying Diana actually wrote a non-fiction.
I am NOT saying that this could be Top Secret info that could get me in trouble.
I ain't sayin' shit.

9) Learning Gaelic by Osmosis


It is a proven fact that babies can learn a language by simply being around it for large periods of time, so, as a bonus to any paid worker on the Outlander sets, their babies (newborn to 9 months) are allowed to sit in their prams (as seen here in a season 3 still in Glasgow, Scotland) and soak in the language...literally.

To date, no less than 7 OB (Outlander Babies) are fluent in Gaelic after 2 seasons worth of on-set live Gaelic osmosis. However, 1 wee lad cannot speak any English at all now, so he is being planted on the set of Game of Thrones.


10) Time Travel stories can Have Awfully Flexible TimeLines and Potential for OffShoot Stories. #sponsormoney

Caitriona Balfe is a good actress with a face and temperament made for adventure. Why not take advantage of it? These pictures are the newly released 'prequels' to Outlander called 'BEFORE JAMIE: Claire's Adventures Before She Finally Hit Scotland'. They are 15 minute segments that will be seen just after The Skyboat Song and just before the episode of the hour. These are a few of them...

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*PLEASE NOTE: if you are a human living on earth, you should know that this entire blog piece is untrue. Just having fun...ha ha. If you are an invading alien with one or more laser-type weapons, then this piece is still untrue, except the Time Traveling part. That part is true and you will not find me, so stop looking. I am not hiding. I am long goooooooooone...

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

OUTLANDERPOLY GAME: Complete with Chance, Community Chest and Property Cards! *FREE TO PRINT AND PLAY*

Okay.

I made this OUTLANDERPOLY game a while back and posted it online for all to use, and promised to make cards etc....but Life happened and I am just getting to it now. Sorry.

Between work, kids, hubbypoo, writing, photography and being admin on the BIGGEST and BEST Outlander group on FaceBook (click here to join the fun!), Time got away on me. *and daydreaming about wild jungle sex with Boromir takes up space too ya know...

So here you go.  All done. Print, then cut it all out, and enjoy! Here are the instructions:

1) Use this like any other Monopoly game. Same rules apply (or make up your own!)
2) Use whatever you like for tokens: beads, Cheerios, buttons, dried clumps of haggis...anything goes. You will need a pair of dice.
3) Monopoly money can be used but understand that I wanted to make it more Outlanderly, so I used Jocasta's Gold Bricks for currency, and Gold Coins. Each Brick is worth 30 Coins (30 dollars). *So when you pass GO, for example, you can gain either 200 Coins or 7 Bricks.
4) I've never played it yet...who has time?...so since I suck at math and all things logical, if this does not work while you play {size/pixel-wise or currency-wise} let me know and I can try and correct it.
5) It should all print well, but I am not 100% sure of the board as it is less pixels than the cards... *sigh*  I may need to re-do it larger? Let me know in the comment section...
**click on all pics to enlarge


THE PLAYING BOARD: measures 1000 x 1000 pixels #Outlanderpoly






THE PROPERTY CARDS


THE CHANCE AND COMMUNITY CHEST CARDS



I hope you enjoy this game as much as I had making it! I have heard there are a lot of Outlander Monopoly games out there but I haven't seen any to compare with yet. This one is Original and Mine. Just sayin'... *begins to think that a 'YOU WIN A FREE RIDE ON JAMIE' card might have been fun to add.... *grin*
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**MORE OUTLANDER MEMES HERE...QUEEN OF MEME: CLICK

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

OUTLANDER VIRTUAL PUZZLES: 25 PUZZLES IN VARYING LEVELS OF DIFFICULTY

I. LOVE. PUZZLES.

Online puzzles are my new GoTo place to relax, forget about how I will never be able to comfort and hug TVFrank or marry BookJamie (or have wild jungle sex with Boromir ...but that's another story...)

Grab your drink of choice, some snacks and Click on these Virtual Outlander Puzzles I made (CLICK THE PUZZLE TITLE) and have some fun! 
*NOTE: ALL PHOTOS ARE FROM ONLINE SOURCES AND NOT MY OWN






















































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HARDCORE PUZZLES FOR THE BRAVE AND BOLD
300 PIECE PUZZLES



















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Part 2...more puzzles HERE

Monday, September 5, 2016

OUTLANDER SEASON 3: 10 OUTRAGEOUS SNEAK PEEK LEAKS!


Starz Outlander has a defector.
And he’s a talkin’.

These 10 leaked photos will have the Outlander Fandom shell shocked and shittin' sandbags. Hard to believe but...

1) DAVID BERRY WILL BE BLONDE LIKE ‘BOOK’ LORD JOHN GREY, BUT HERE IS HOW THEY DECIDED ON HIS 'LOOK'!


I don’t think everyone took the vote seriously (see discarded ballot below), which is disturbing to many fans because now they know why we didn’t get a yellow eyed Claire…


2) THE AUDITION CALL FOR A VIRGIN TO PLAY THE PART OF THE CONNIVING GENEVA DUNSANY CAUSED RIOTS.
News of the audition went viral on social media and all Hell broke loose last week as hundreds of 'virgins', aged 18 to 96, clogged the streets and subways on the path to Starz headquarters. There were road blockages, taxi hijackings, and stores in a 200 mile radius sold out of 'Young Vixen' Halloween costumes, blonde hair dye, Sweet16 Rouge By Revlon, Oxytokin wrinkle cream, girdles and Slim Fast.
And Multi-gyn Vaginal Douche Combipacks

Starz has stated that their auditions for Jamie Fraser's Cave Sex partner will be kept MUCH more secret.

 


3) JOHNNY DEPP WILL BE PLAYING PIRATE STEPHEN BONNET!



After years of negotiations, the plum role of the dashing but deadly pirate, Stephen Bonnet, will be played by Oscar winning actor, Johnny Depp who will revise his role as Captain Jack Sparrow...but be called Captain Stephen Bonnet. It is rumoured that the bizarre bonus demands extracted by the Hollywood mega-star were so crazy that...JUST WAIT...THIS JUST IN! JOHNNY DEPP IS OUT! His 2 dogs, Kah & Ching, caught cold and he has chosen to break the contract with Starz and fly them to Australia for proper care.

There is no word who will fill his shoes, but there are whispers that Westley from The Princess Bride may be willing to give it a go. For a quarter the price.

  
4) ONE OF THE DIVA BONUSES FROM DEPP'S NOW DEFUNCT CONTRACT WILL BE USED FOR BONNIE PRINCE CHARLIE'S HIDDEN TREASURE.

The life-size solid gold statue of Captain Jack Sparrow that Johnny Depp had asked for will get some use after all. However, because the cost of re-smelting the gold to make bricks to hide in Jocasta's Plantation as per the books, the statue will remain intact and simply stand in the foyer as a hat rack. As a person who appreciates a good hat (read: Frank's Fedora) I, personally, am good with this decision.



5) THERE BE VOODOO AND MAGIC RITUALS AFOOT...BUT THE RESEARCH HAS BEEN...UMMM....UNCONVENTIONAL.

There is a plethora of literature and knowledge out there to help bring Diana Gabaldon's voodoo and magic based plot lines to life in a realistic and believable manor, however, Starz has seen fit to use this as their primary example to guide their decisions:



6)  JAMIE AND LAOGHAIRE (OR 'LEGHAIR' TO MANY OF US) ARE MARRIED AND ENJOY NIGHTLY SEX.

The story demands that Jamie and Leghair marry, but it was deemed unrealistic that such a virile studMcMuffin like Jamie would only settle for monthly nookie, so it was decided that they would have nightly marital romps, but only like Jamie always believed it should be for the 23 years before he met Claire: horsey style. That way, Jamie could still be 'active', but not have to actually see Leghair's face. Starz hopes this appeases the volatile fandom who could burst, literally, into flames at the mere mention of Ms. Leg O'Hair's name.



7) FRANK IS SEEN IN EVERY OTHER SCENE!

Claire cannot figure out what secrets Frank is keeping and although the signs all point to a cheating husband who helps his students with more than their homework after school...but she is clever and senses there is something not quite right with it all. The season is knee deep in Red Herrings and Frank just may be the Tragic Hero of the entire story, loving Claire unconditionally and raising Bree to be strong and brave. I hear we see Frank in myriad flashbacks and hear his Panty Loosening Baritone often...but then again, I may have dreamed that part.... #OrgasmicMI6

  

8) THE LORD JOHN GREY STORYLINE HAS A SPIN-OFF BOOK SERIES, SO WE ARE GOING TO SEE A SPIN-OFF TV VERSION AS WELL.


But it's a strange adaptation that sees LJG go THROUGH the Stones (SHOCKER!)  and enjoy a career as a fitness guru named 'Richard'. This satisfied the brewing jealousy between Sam Heughan and David Berry, which stemmed from David not having his own 'Peek Challenge'. Now he does...kinda. And here is a sneakier peeker:

*I think the Lead Stone Dancer, Mrs. Graham, went with him too! In the purple?



9) SAM HAD TO LEARN TO PLAY THE HARMONICA.


Caitriona had her musical interlude with 'Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy', and Sam, never one to be one-upped, insisted on having his time in the musical spotlight too...so he learned to play the harmonica, which he uses to play a 12 minute solo while doing his hard time in Ardsmuir Prison. #HeartbreakMcHotel

*TIP: This may be a good time, during the show, to have ones' bathroom break and grab some snacks.


10) THIS PRESS RELEASE SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.


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These 10 'leaks' may or not be REAL leaks, but more a series of 10 'drips'...if you get my drift. And if you do, give it back. It's mine.