WHY THIS BLOG?

I AM PARCA'S CHOSEN:
Parca is the Roman Goddess of Childbirth and Destiny and after you get to know me, you will see why I believe she has, without doubt, made me her Poster Child. I deal with the odd serious issue but for the most part, my posts are just some cheeky fun, reviews of favorite shows, and true stories that will make you laugh out loud (or run screaming...I don't know you well enough to predict your behavior). You'll find satire with the odd parody tossed in....and most definitely a generous helping of hyperbole, with a dollop of facetiousness.

I am Canadian so expect a bit of politeness too. Sorry.

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1) MY eBOOKS CAN BE FOUND ON AMAZON HERE:
DENISE ON AMAZON
2) MY eBook Trailers are on YOUTUBE
3) My website:denisesevierfries.com
4) My Photo-Art Youtube Trailer is here too.

5) My old monthly column: The Lighter Side of Self Publishing
6) Outlander Series Facebook forum: the popular book/tv series group I am admin on, is The BEST and BIGGEST with over 80,000+ members! Come join us! *click on bold red words

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

OUTLANDER~ AN OPEN LETTER TO JAMIE FRASER: THE LAOGHAIRE INTIATIVE (or '70 Ways To Leave Your LegHair' *deepest apologies to Paul Simon)



Dear Jamie,
 
In light of the recent resurrection of the #Boobgate Affair, that I may or may not have helped inflame, I felt it incumbent upon myself to issue this warning to you directly:


You are in great danger.


I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I also bring you hope. And a plan of action. But first, let me explain things to you:


When you allowed LegHair, which is, by the way, the pseudo-phonetic nickname many of us use for Laoghaire, as most of us are snarky bitches when we have to share our Book Boyfriends with The Unworthy…but never mind that for now…where was I...right…when you allowed LegHair to place your married hand on her ample albino-like, goose-pimpled breast it caused an uproar in Fandomland, the likes that is reserved for more  Bill ‘The Cos’ Cosby- like halo slippages, when he fell into the Grand Canyon of celebrity Scandaldom (which is amazing since Bill is...like...you know...real!)


How do I know of your impending doom? Well, like your wife, I am from the Future and I’m telling you son…Leghair is not done with you yet. You can trust me. I even made a Black Jack Randall Voodoo Doll so I could help slow the bastard down a notch and keep him off of you. I have your back kiddo.


So…what to do about LegHair’s plans to make you hers.


Well, you have proven yourself incapable of staving off the advances of the wee wretched wenchling on your own, so I have mined the experiences of some close, personal friends and their actions, reproduced here with the wonder of modern technology (let’s just call it Fairie Magic) which will give you the tools to protect yourself from LegHair the next time she corners you and offers you boobage to caress and perhaps other fleshy naughties to nibble.


Study these tried and true actions, memorize them, and you, my sweet man-child, will be safe from that manipulative manhandling menace. 

 

                                             THE LAOGHAIRE INITIATIVE
*a.k.a. 70 Ways To Leave Your LegHair (with my deepest apologies to Paul Simon)


                                 How to react next time LegHair reaches out for you:
*click to enlarge









































































Feel free to save this correspondence to refer back to now and then so you can keep up your new Anti-LegHair Skills.


Much love and best wishes from a wizened old Canadian fan,


Denise Sevier-Fries

*PS: just a quick tip or two…stay away from lead lined hats and buy some property from a family named Clampett in the Ozarks in the USA. Again, just trust me. Do it.


2 comments:

  1. Love your writing style! You tend to write like I think. A very talented lady you are. I have read "Parca's Forsaken" by the way and absolutely loved it. Have "The Saving of NATION" tucked neatly on my Kindle and plan on starting that next-----after I re-read Outlander! Thank you for taking time to put together this "tribute" to Leghair!

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    1. If you think how I write then we could go halfers on expensive therapy if you like. ;) jj MANY thanks Dottie for the kind words and even more thanks for liking my ebook! My books are a work of love and I cannot tell you how special it is to hear others (besides my family who I cannot trust to soften or hide any hard criticism they may have! LOL!) enjoyed the story. I hope you like NATION...quiet different form Parca's...(Please leave a rating on Amazon if you will...it helps get the story out there... :) ) CHEERS!

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I really do appreciate you reading and perhaps sharing my blog pieces and hoped you enjoyed them. Leave a comment if you like and I will reply asap. *NOTE: I have strong opinions and will gladly respond to respectful debate or disagreement, but too many people use blogs as a platform for their insanity and hate, so be aware that my moderator will not allow Haters to spread their hate and I personally only see comments, good or bad, that are not rude.