OUTLANDER FRIENDSHIP TEST
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LINK THIS 3-PART TEST TO ANY POTENTIAL 'FRIEND' AND IF THEY CAN PASS IT, PROOF OF THEIR BEING OUTLANDERNATED WILL BE CONFIRMED.
*if they fail, you may want to reconsider spending your time with them. I mean really, what would you talk about?
PART 1
3 BASIC MUST-KNOW QUESTIONS
1) WHO IS JAMIE?
a) a stable boy
b) a warrior Scotsman
c) a whorehouse bouncer
2) WHO IS CLAIRE?
a) a dockside harlot
b) a beautician
c) a Time Traveling doctor
3) WHAT IS A LEGHAIR?
a) a stubbly leg infestation
b) a spoiled brat
c) the reason Claire almost got burned as a witch.
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PART 2
FINISH THIS SENTENCE:
DIANA GABALDON IS A....
a) wife
b) writer
c) mother
d) doctor
e) creative genius
f) gravelly voiced sex goddess
g) all of the above
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PART 3
VISUAL RESPONSES
LOOK AT THE FOLLOWING PHOTOS AND CHOOSE AN APPROPRIATE ANSWER:
1) a) Ah! True love!
b) I may vomit.
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2) a) Family ties bind are sacred and their devotion is inspiring.
b) Dougal should invest in armour.
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3) a) That necklace stole the scene!
b) Murtagh sure loved her lovely swans!
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4) a) There was no better wig maker in all of France or the world!
b) He was heads above the rest!
5) a) This scene after Jaime's cousin's wedding was sweet.
b) His boots were made for more than walking.
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6) a) The ladies traditionally gather every weekend to wash the church curtains.
b) The ladies sure know how to pound the piss out of their laundry!
7) a) Look how green that foliage is! Lovely!
b) *begin singing* "He's got the whole world, in his hands, he's got the whole wide world, in his hands..." *begin spontaneous multiple orgasms*
8) a) Being a wife and mother was all she ever wanted.
b) She should have a sign tattooed above her vagina that says 'Enter At Your Own Risk".
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9) a) They could not believe the size of King Louis's penis on his braggadocios statue atop the Palace staircase!
b) 'Seeing red' does not always mean one is angry...
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10) a) The scene where Black Jack travels to 1948 and lands in a Macey's.
b) His wife gets 'stoned' and HE ends up in the police station!
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11) a) Waking up after dreaming she had been ridden harder than a rodeo bull on steroids by a redheaded virginal Scotsman.
b) Waking up STILL wearing her belt and watch.
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12) a) A local nun trying out for The Von Trapp Family Singers.
b) A healer who has a special friend with a nose for trouble.
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13) a) Claire finds a mole shaped like Australia, if Australia wore combat boots.
b) Claire discovers that she likes kilts. And the steaming hot hunks of manflesh that wear them.
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14) a) Claire's necklace was made from the bone of a white whale.
b) This trinket is so beautiful...its to DIE for!
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15) a) Sam and Cait get together with Cait's parents for a fun evening.
b) A crazy but happy Outlander family.
SCORE:
IF THE SCORE HIGHER THAN 100%, THEN YOU CAN SAFELY ACCEPT YOUR NEW OUTLANDER FRIEND.
IF THE SCORE IS ANY LOWER, YOU CAN ADVISE THIS PERSON TO READ/WATCH OUTLANDER AND COME BACK TO TRY AGAIN.
AND TO BRING WHISKEY.
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